What She Says

Ava is quite the talker these days.  There are a lot of words we understand...and a lot that we don't.  She's sweet, funny, and caring all mixed together with a dash of almost-two-year's-old-craziness.  I'm afraid if I don't start writing down what she says, I may someday forget!

• She is very much into books right now - but NOT us reading to her.  There's a little independent streak in her nature that makes her want to do it herself.  She babbles as she "reads" and it's the cutest thing ever.  When she does let us sit near her when she's got a book, her little fingers point to pictures and she says, "Wha dat?"  Over and over and over.  Sometimes she knows what she's pointing to, but she gets stuck on that phrase. 

"Wha dat?"

• We once had a conversation that went like this:

"Ava, it's time for bed."
"No!"
"Yes, it's time to go upstairs."
"No!"
"Come on Ava, bed time."
"NO...dammit."

I have no idea where she heard that word.  But kudos to her for using it in the correct context!

• The sweetest thing ever is hearing her little voice say, "I wuv ooo."
• She's got a puzzle of shapes - rectangle, circle, square, etc.  She knows where all of the pieces go, but will put a piece on the wrong shape and then say, "Noooooo" in a long, drawn-out way.  Only after that does she put the piece in its correct spot.
• She knows all the kids at daycare and we often talk about who she played with during the day.  Today she told me that she played with "Tay."  She means Kate.  
• If Ava asks you for an "ale," she wants a wipe.  If she asks you for "no," she means milk.  

• I think we're moving past this phase, but for the longest time, Ava asked for "Cheer-o's" at least ten times a day.  First thing in the morning?  "I want Cheer-o's."  Getting home from daycare?  Cheer-o's.  Driving in the car?  Cheer-o's.  
• She only likes it when I sing to her at bedtime.  If I sing any other time, she looks at me and says, "No, Mama."  I guess I won't try out for American Idol.  I can't even impress a 23 month old.
• What we do sing at bedtime is the ABC's.  Ava sort of knows it.  "A-B-E-F-P."  She's only missing a few letters, right?
• Ava and I get home before Jeremy during the week.  Every little sound she hears outside, she thinks he's just gotten home...and she looks at me and whispers, "Dada?" in a hopeful voice.  
• She loves her friend Ella so much that she has named a Strawberry Shortcake figurine from a Happy Meal after her.  Don't call her Strawberry Shortcake.  It's ELWA!

• She has become quite the boss around our house.  If she tells you to sit, you'd better sit.  And she's very specific about the spot where you sit too.  Often, she wants you to sit in one of her PlaySkool chairs...and those things are not sized for adult behinds!
• Besides Cheer-o's, her favorite foods are: pasta (pa-pa), crackers (cacka), bread (breah)...you know, no carbs or anything.
• Every old man is "papaw."  In the store, on TV, in magazines..."papaw."  

I'm anxious to hear all the things she says and comes up with as a two year old.  Her language has blossomed so much lately, and it's amazing to listen to that sweet voice...even when she is saying "dammit."  

Gearing up for TWO

Hi there...it's been a while.  Have you missed us?

We've had quite an exciting winter over here in Indiana...lots of snow and ice, which has resulted in two early dismissals from school, two 2-hour delays, and now, THREE "snow" days.  Ice days, really, since the entire ground outside is one huge skating rink.  We're surviving here at home...taking it easy, staying in our jammies, playing with baby dolls, solving puzzles and reading books. 

We're gearing up for two over here...and by two, I don't mean two kids in this house.  Not yet!  I mean two years old.  Ava's birthday is right around the corner, and I've been busy making invites and sending them out, scouring websites for party paraphernalia and debating trips to the Dollar Store for plates and napkins.  The theme is settled.  Can you guess what it is?

Nice baggy pants, kid...

Have you guessed yet?

Two more weeks to get ready for this shindig.  It'll be the first party where Ava's little friends will be there: Ella, Kate and Claire.  I think the girls are going to have a fabulous time!  Speaking of good times and friends, Ava and Claire recently had a play date.  The difference in their age - only 7 months - is still quite apparent, but nevertheless, they seemed to have a great time together.

What does two years old mean, anyway?  Everyone warns about the "terrible twos," although I've heard three is worse.  What's so terrible about a young one learning and growing each day?  About asserting his or her independence?  Yes, it takes ten times longer to let your little girl put her own shoes on, but look how happy she is to have accomplished the task!

And soon, putting shoes on by herself will be second nature...and then she'll move on to something else, like scouring magazines for good articles and recipes.

I know there are going to be tantrums.  I know that the little things to her are a BIG deal, and I will try my hardest to give her space to do things on her own.  She'll still need her mama for a lot though, and that is what will keep me going. 

Right now, we are at a good spot in Ava's life.  She has the freedom to play on her own or with us, whichever she chooses.  She colors with crayons, markers, pens...whatever she can get her hands on.  We have our own little baby doll daycare that Ava runs all by herself, feeding and changing diapers and taking the babies on walks in their strollers.

She is a little mama through and through, loving on these baby dolls, speaking so kindly to them, always concerned about their well-being.  She sets them in their high chairs and says, "There you go."  She stirs spoons in jars of pretend baby food and asks, "Wanna bite?  Wanna bite?"  When they "poo" in their diapers, it's a must to use baby wipes and REAL diapers to change them.  Where did this precious little almost-two-year-old come from?

Two years old...it's right around the corner.  We're ready!

Get Real!

I'll admit it.  I had high expectations about how I would raise my child when I was pregnant.  "I'll never let my baby chew on dirty toys/menus/books/whathaveyou."  "My child will not eat chips or French fries or cookies."  "I won't allow my daughter to be passed around at family functions - what if someone is SICK?!!!"

Once Ava was born, I worried...a lot.  Was I doing the right thing?  Should I let her cry it out or should I go in and comfort her?  Did she eat enough?  Is she getting sick?  Whose advice should I take?  Taking care of a baby is stressful enough, but when we're bombarded with information from friends, relatives, websites, message boards, magazine and books, it makes it even more stressful - not helpful!  There are "better" ways of doing certain things - it's "better" if your child never eats French fries and it's "better" if you read to them every single night, but sometimes?  You're trying to cook dinner, your baby is wailing at your feet and the phone keeps ringing.  Buying yourself 10 minutes of peace by letting your child watch cartoons or make a mess with finger paints or eat a cookie isn't the end of the world. 

There is so much pressure to be the best mom ever.  But nobody can fulfill that role 24/7...it's not realistic.  There are moms out there who come close; moms who breastfeed past a year, make all of their baby's food, buy only organic products, cloth diaper, etc.  And that's great for them, but it's not me. 

Now that Ava is almost two, I am a much more relaxed mom.  What used to bother me can now easily be swept under the rug.  Ava had hot dogs and mac 'n cheese for lunch two days in a row?  Big deal.  We sleep trained her and let her cry it out?  Now she sleeps through the night and doesn't wake up until after 8am on the weekends.  She stayed up an hour past her bedtime because we had friends over?  Oh well.  In the grand scheme of things...none of this is the end of the world.  I'm not sure why there's so much pressure to always do the right thing as a parent.  We're human.  We make mistakes.  We try our hardest and do what we think is best.  And what's best for one family may not be the best for another family.  And that's okay! 

I'm looking forward to adding to our family in the future.  I hope that the second time around with a newborn will be easier and that I won't worry so much about the little things.  I want to be able to make a decision and move on instead of beating myself up about it as I did with Ava.  I think the key is to trust your gut.  You  know what's right for your own child and YOU are the parent, which means you get to make the decisions...not some random author of a book or a stranger on a message board.

To all the moms out there, I applaud you.  We're all in this together, no matter what our decisions are: breastfeed or formula, organic or...non-organic, disposable or cloth diapers, make our own baby food or buy it, co-sleep or not.  Get real for YOURSELF!  You'll feel so much better once you do!

Growing Up

There are lots of firsts in a child's life, moments that as a parent are so rewarding and heart-warming: the first time you hear mama or dada, the first few awkward, stumbling steps, the first birthday filled with family, presents and cake all over the place.

Ava has hit a new first that makes my heart swell with happiness: first friend.

Amidst the adults chatting, a football game in the background and the opening and closing of the cooler for another beverage, shrieks were heard.  And giggles.  Little feet pitter-pattered down the hall, voices called out to each other, toy grocery carts were pushed and baby dolls were cared for.

Ava and Ella have been around each other many times and have played before, but this time was different.  They played together.  For a long time.  And they had an absolute blast.

This is a first that maybe a lot of parents don't think about or take for granted.  But to me, it's something special.  Watching your child interact and have so much fun with another child is...well, it's awesome.  It's dream turned into reality: "When we're grown up and have kids, our kids will play together and be best friends, just like us!"

Yes, I used to have that conversation with friends.  And maybe Kelli and I haven't been friends since childhood and wished those dreams together, but I bet we both wished for it when we were younger.  Who knows if Ava and Ella will grow to be good friends or not, but for now, they are perfect little friends.

By this time next year, Kate can join in with the girls' fun...and maybe she'll get a playmate of her own one of these days!

Ava is also really close to her uncle Matt.  She cannot get enough of him.  A few times a week, she lets her feelings be known.  We'll be driving in the car and she'll suddenly exclaim, "I wa Maa!"  Thankfully she gets to see him often.  We're lucky to have family that lives so close to us!

This darling girl of mine is just growing up so fast.  I can't believe she'll be TWO in a little over a month.  Everything within her has started blossoming out of control: her social interactions, her words, the tasks she can do around the house.  Now if only we could teach her to change the cat litter...

Gone are the baby days: no more bottles, no chubby fat-rolled thighs, no toothless grins.  We have a full-fledged toddler on our hands who is slowly but surely becoming a little girl.  Where does the time go?

In the blink of an eye, this little girl will be a teenager with lots of friends - and lots of drama.  I'm glad that right now, I have the chance to enjoy her simple friendships and the little things in life that make her happy: an armful of bracelets, bowls of "Cheer-o's" within reach, baby dolls to love on, and lots of books to read.

In the meantime, I need to start planning a second birthday party!  It'll be here before I know it...